“Whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst.”
Every man from the moment of his birth is full of desire—humans
want warmth, to be held, to slake their thirst and appetite. As we grow older
our desires become more complex: we desire recognition, security of position;
we desire romantic love and acceptance; we desire a good name. Given our sinful
condition our desires often become corrupt and perverse and frustrate our goals
and the goals of others. The desire of wealth devolves into avarice and leads
to hoarding that destroys wealth creation; the headlong and promiscuous pursuit
of love destroys the stability and commitment upon which true love is built.
Be that as it may, desire in and of itself is not bad.
Humanity would long have been extinct had it not been for mankind’s natural
sexual urge. What progress would we have without the desire to learn and know?
It is not desire that is evil, but disordered desire. Desire in itself, when
morally and temperately pursued, can lead us to the End of all desire. This is
not to say a man will cease wanting new things. Rather there is a purpose, a
final goal, that drives all of our desires, but that is not found in the desire
itself. This great mover is above and behind all desire, driving desire beyond
itself towards its true and ultimate purpose.
Nearly all our desires correspond to an earthly
consummation. For example, we hunger, there is food; we tire, there is rest; we
desire to know and be known, there is family and community. Yet as C. S. Lewis
pointed out, there remains a desire greater and beyond all desires that nothing
on earth can satisfy. Given that all our other desires correspond to means of
consummation it is only logical to reason that this desire too has a means of consummation.
Since that consummation cannot be found in this earth we may infer that it can
be found outside our world. Now, desire alone does not prove satisfaction—a
hungry man may die of starvation. But hunger does prove that we are beings that
require food to survive.
Our ultimate desire, the desire behind all other desires,
is our desire for God. This desire does not prove that we will obtain God, but
it is good proof that we are made to know and be known by God.
Lacking connection with God we turn to pale idols, weak
imitations of what can only be found truly in Him. Lacking security in Him we
seek security in money; lacking acceptance in Him we vainly seek it in the
approval of our peers or in the romantic embrace of another. These idols, being
dumb and mute, can never satisfy our longings for the infinite and eternal.
A great example of their failure is seen in Fitzgerald’s The Great Gatsby. The title character
makes the pursuit of a woman the center of his life. His love for her is
obsessive and grand, extending high above and beyond the typical bonds of
romantic love. When Gatsby finally is united with the object of his passion and
obtains all he has been longing after, he is still left unsatisfied. “There
must have been moments even that afternoon when Daisy tumbled short of his
dreams—not through her own fault but because of the colossal vitality of his
illusion. It had gone beyond her, beyond everything.” Gatsby looked to a finite
human to quench his longing for the infinite. The object of his desire broke
his heart and left him broken and alone at the time of his death.
St. Augustine, like Gatsby, was a man of desire. Augustine
too desired the love of women; he too desired to make himself great. But unlike
Gatsby Augustine turned from these false pursuits and turned towards God. As he
himself prayed to God, “You make us for yourself, and nothing else will do. Our
hearts are restless until they rest in you.”
Recognizing Christ as the ultimate fulfillment of every
noble and good desire freed Augustine to rightly enjoy the things of this
world. Following Christ does not mean hating all things, as Augustine
discovered, but rather thanking God for all things and enjoying all things in
God.
Without God, our enjoyment of things can never be temperate.
As St. Thomas Aquinas pointed out, “All men need love. When deprived of true
love men must needs turn to false love.” Without God we will always be tempted
to expect too much from the things of this world and give to these created
things the devotion merited only by their Creator.
The love of earthly things apart from God can only make a
man wretched. If in this place a man is willing to admit his wretchedness and
seek his happiness elsewhere, God in His grace will often lead him to Himself
as He did with Augustine. If, however, the man doubles down and seeks to find
his happiness in created things he will not find God and not overcome his
wretchedness.
Pascal said there are there three types of people: those
that seek and are happy that they find, those that seek and will find, but are
unhappy until they find, and those that don’t seek and remain blind to their
inevitable and eternal unhappiness.
Our unrequited desires will lead to unhappiness on this
earth. While earthbound even the greatest saints long for deeper intimacy with
God—this intimacy will only be found in Heaven. This frustration need not be in
vain. The purpose of desire and its inevitable earthly frustration is to lead
us to seek things beyond the world. If it leads us to seek God, we will have
moments of frustration still, but insignificant will they be in light of the
glory and beautification that will be ours as we know and love and enjoy our
Maker and Redeemer for all eternity.